“You make the Titanic look like a tiny little misadventure.” ~Gina Ranalli

The recent death of radio star Kidd Kraddick reminded me of a time I almost won a thousand dollars.  Almost.

It was September 22, 2011.  Kidd was running a contest called Credit Card Roulette.  The object was that he would announce a four-digit number, and if you had a credit card that ended in those digits, you were supposed to upload a picture of those numbers from your card.

Then, they would select three listeners whose numbers matched, and Kidd would call all three names out on air.  The first of the three listeners to call in would win $1,000.

Let me begin by backing up a little.  I listened to Kidd Kraddick in the Morning every single morning.  From start to finish.  I would turn it on the second I got in the car in the morning, listen to it all the way to work, and then once I got to work, I’d listen to the rest of the morning’s show on my computer.

I even had the boys looking forward to listening every morning.  Their favorite was Hizziewood Hizzle and Kinsey.  “J-Si, what the hell…”

And every single day that I had those matching four numbers, I’d take a picture of half of my credit card, upload it, and wait for my name to be called.  Only, every day, that didn’t happen.  He’d call Suzie and Billy and Sammy.  Or April and Lisa and Angela.

But he’d never call Alicia.

There was one morning that I had to drive about two hours to the nearest Federal Court to file a Complaint.  As usual, I was listening to KKITM, but eventually I got nothing but static.  Bummed, I found another clear station, got to the Court, filed my Complaint, and headed back to work.

When I got back, I couldn’t wait to catch up on the half of the show I’d missed when the radio station went out.  I played the second half of that morning’s show from my desk.  When the Credit Card Roulette segment came up, this is what I heard:

“The three listeners with today’s Credit Card Roulette numbers are … Alicia Benton … Jane Dow … and June Doe.  The first of the three to call us at 1-800-543-3548 will win $1,000!!!”

ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME?!  YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.

I couldn’t believe what I’d heard.  Thinking I must be going crazy, I rewound the video, and I listened to it again.  “The three listeners with today’s Credit Card Roulette numbers are … Alicia Benton …”

FUDGE!  EFF, DASH, DASH, DASH!

I continued to listen through the song they played right after announcing the names – which included MINE – and as one of the bitches called in and won MY money!

I sat in disbelief, more pissed off at myself for listening to the show than for having to miss that segment that morning.  Why did I even have to go back and listen to it?!

Of course, I then made it worse by thinking about it a million and ten times over the next few weeks.  I played that part of the show over and over and over.  And over.  I made my mom listen to it and my sister listen to it and the hubby listen to it.  I just couldn’t believe that the ONE show I missed was the one where Kidd finally called my name.

And I KNOW I would have been the first to call in.  I’d had the number programmed in my phone for the two months prior that they’d been running that contest.  Dammit!

Anyway, as I recall that bittersweet moment, I remember, with fondness, all the mornings I’d spend on my way to work, tears rolling down my cheeks from laughter.  Kidd, Kellie, Big Al, J-Si, and Jenna would make all of my mornings better.  It’s a shame that the mastermind behind the funniest morning show on the air has passed away far too young.

Rest in peace, Kidd Kraddick.

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