Okay, so I thought that making the transition from my 20s to my 30s is what would officially mean I was “old.” I was wrong. The true sign of my senior status (in my kids’ eyes, at least) happened this morning. As Gerald and I were sitting in the car together, wasting time before he had to go into school, the following conversation took place. [Please note that in addition to the actual words that were spoken, I am also going to throw in those thoughts that were never actually spoken out loud…] Our conversation went as follows:
Gerald: Hey Mom, who is Robert De Niro?
Me: [Are you kidding me?] Robert De Niro? [Am I that old – geez?] Only one of the best actors of all time.
Gerald: Really? Oh. Is he black?
Me: What?! No!!! [You’ve got to be kidding me!]
Gerald: Hmm. Well, what is he in?
Me: The Godfather, man! And Goodfellas! [Are you freaking kidding me?!]
Gerald: I’ve never heard of those. Are you sure he’s really popular, Mom?
Me: [Omg. You’re kidding…] Yep, I’m sure. He’s one of the best, honey.
Gerald: Oh. Well maybe only old people know who he is then.
Me: [Swinging blindly into the back seat where Gerald’s sitting. Come here, you little rat..!] No, I don’t think so. He was in Meet the Fockers. That’s not that old.
Gerald: Ooohhhh! Why didn’t you say that one first, Mom? Now I know who he is! I love that movie – maybe Ronald and I will watch it again this weekend!
Me: Oh, good. [Enjoy it, you little focker. It may be the last movie you ever watch.]
Lesson I learned this morning: I’m officially a failure as a parent. My kids don’t even know who The Godfather is. Guess what we’re really watching this weekend?